I am 22 years old and this blog is going to be my story. It’s not necessarily for anyone to read but it’s for me to try and express myself so that I can begin to understand why I am who I am, hopefully I will fall in love with her.
When I was 15, something happened, I don’t 100% understand what but it was something and it changed me. I don’t know why but it sucks. I have finally come to terms with suffering from depression and I don’t speak to anyone about it because it’s for me to deal with. I always worry that if I were to tell someone then they would either think that I was making it up for attention or feel sorry for me and I don’t want any of that. I have seen psychologists and counselors but they don’t help because they speak to you in generic terms and everyones story is different. There is a lot that I am not happy with but if I continue thinking the way I do, my twenties will fly by, then my thirties and my forties. It is hard focusing on the positives when you’re constantly a ‘half glass empty‘ but if I don’t start now, nothing will ever change. I am searching for something I know that but what that ‘something‘ actually is I haven’t quite figured out. I am scared and it’s funny because if you met me you’d probably think I was the most outgoing, confident human there ever was; unfortunately I’m not. I hope that one day I can really be that person and not have to pretend but things take time and in life there are no quick fixes, I have tried the lot.
Today, I am having one of those days and I honestly have no one to turn too. Hopefully this will help me and maybe others to see that ‘there is light at the end of the tunnel.‘
learntoloveyourselfsophie 